Valentines
Ever since I was 16 I've celebrated it with people of both genders, in romantic and platonic ways. I've wined, dined, watched Titanic, and wandered the city for corners still hidden from lingering touch.
I spent this one at home with my mother. Whatever the occasion means to people, I think that she too believes one should never be lonely.
She made me a delicious dry carbonara full of egg, bacon and parsley. We watched the 9 pm Channel 8 drama starring her old favourite Christopher Lee, then later at 10 it was Desperate Housewives with my new favourite Teri Hatcher.
At 11 I surfed the net, a little ashamed to go on msn. She made me some chrysanthemum tea, and handed me my allowance. Other then specific birthday presents, she has never asked for anything in return.
How many are lucky to find love outside one's family that is truly not fleeting? I wonder if I'll always be chasing after an Oedipal ideal.
At 12 I decided to go to bed.
posted by Terry at 10:49 PM
2 Comments:
Unfortunately, finding that ideal is not anyone's birthright, much as we all like to think it is.
I think you're handling it alot better than some people I know, who allowed themselves to become neurotic over time.
I guess one way to look at this, which you may already be doing, is to think of yourself as the giver in a relationship. Be that kind of someone you're looking for, and maybe things will fall into place.
11:44 PM
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8:53 AM
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